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Who am I?
As April approaches we begin to do as we, meaning Autism parents, do all year long; Educate others and support our little troopers who suffer from this unfortunate disorder or delay as I like to call it, as part of World Autism Month. Autism Spectrum Disorder is a developmental delay in the brain which effects an individuals communication, behavior, social interactions, sensory processing and much much more. The rates in diagnosing have increased tremendously, this in my opinion is due to the fact that we are becoming more aware and educated on the early signs of Autism; in spreading awareness of this disorder we can attack early intervention and help those diagnosed cope with the delays and hit developments and milestones on time.
Sensory Overload Simulation
There is so much to learn about Autism, This post is not just to inform you of what the disorder is but to give you an idea of what a typical day is like for an individual suffering from Autism. Unlike you and I, these angels can not process their surroundings in the same manner as we do which makes daily tasks such as shopping, commuting, learning and even eating difficult to do. I learn daily how to cope with Autism alongside my daughter who is living with it, I will never know what she is truly feeling but I have a generalized idea on how to help her; however, I am learning new things daily and am always adapting as well as keeping an open mind.
Sariyah, my daughter, is 8 years old; she can be difficult but it's usually when she's overstimulated. She relies heavily on her schedule, consistency and routines; it can easily ruin her day if we are late, there is something new in the schedule or if she doesn't have her belongings. Eating out, going shopping or attending events can be difficult if I am not fully prepared. When Sariyah is overstimulated this causes her to have tantrum like outbursts which results in people staring or giving behavioral modification advise. Ever since she was a toddler I was told if I would just discipline her more then we wouldn't face these outbursts; if it were only that simple. Be it Autism, the terrible two's or just plain behavioral issues in no way shape or form does spanking your child correct the behavioral issue, i'm sorry. Although sometimes necessary, I would much rather teach my child to overcome the behavior than to instill fear or intimidation as a lesson. What is that really teaching? It's teaching them that violence solves the problem which it doesn't. Another upsetting phrase we get is "your child doesn't look Autistic!" Okay... Really??!?!? And you didn't look stupid from far away either, but I see now I was mistaken.
Sariyah's outbursts range from mild to aggressive and can be avoided if you understand the signals she gives you. Dealing with these behaviors requires a great amount of patience and understanding, providing repetitive prompts which at times makes her even more angry but persistence is necessary in improving her communication skills. Sariyah, who has an extremely limited vocabulary is prompted to use her words when asking for things by placing my finger below my lips. This has helped her when getting frustrated as others rarely understand what she is saying or requesting and hand her things they think she wants. Many times, when Sariyah becomes aggressive with others it is because they are invading her space and making her feel uncomfortable, we are currently still working on managing that particular behavior as well as using prompts to communicate her needs (Visual ques are what work best due to the fact she is overstimulated and tunes out any verbal requests).
What Autism Feels like
Tips for understanding the basic needs for Autism:
1. A well managed routine and schedule will make your life easier as well as theirs proving to reduce stress and allow your child to know what comes next. Stick to a regular and consistent schedule; going to bed and waking up the same time each day, meal schedules and routine, Play time and educational requirements as well as one-on-one time.
2. During meltdowns provide verbal or visual ques to help your child handle the situation differently, promote communication and if punishment is necessary be sure to follow through. Giving in to your child's aggressive behavior will only teach the child that they can manipulate situations through their behavior.
3. Sometimes communication can be difficult. Watch for sign and ques your child is giving you so that you know what they are needing. They might be hungry or tired, sick, scared of confused. Ask your child to show you if you don't understand, be alert to their body language and/or other clues, they are there you just have to have patience and understanding.
4. Children on the spectrum rely on visual cues; showing them how to do something rather than telling them how to do it will allow them to complete a task with less stress and resistance. Practice and consistency is how your child learns, once they understand they will be able to do what is asked of them with verbal requests.
5. Don't underestimate your child, or assume they aren't capable of doing things, they may lack the proper communication skills and processing but there are several ways of getting things done. Teaching is the art of showing how something is done, you aren't helping them learn if you just assume they can't do something. Encourage them to try, encourage others to play with your child, encourage them to try something new.
6. Understand what causes meltdowns so you can prevent them in the future. Meltdowns can be a stimuli overload, a cry for help, a clue they are tired, hungry or thirsty, they forgot something or they are frustrated with not being able to communicate their feelings. Write these triggers down, this will also help so that others who aren't as familiar with your child will know what they should and/or shouldn't do.
7. Be patient and understanding, I can not express this rule enough. We've been through this and by now you are aware of the struggles of an Autism angel. Before passing judgment on a child's behavior understand that they might be facing noise & sensory sensitivity, repetitive movements, patterns and/or obsessions, lacks ability to communicate, anxious or scared. No amount of staring is going to resolve the issue other than make myself and my child feel uncomfortable and uneasy.
What's up with Nick?
